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Probably my most popular Naked guys cuddling well-known YOB posts are my several blogs on cuddling and nudity. Some say these posts have made YOB look less interested in following Jesus, obsessing only over cuddles. But have any of my thoughts changed since I wrote those posts? Other friends have shared that their experiences with male touch to be loving and very beneficial. My own cuddling experiences are all over the place. Perhaps boundaries have been crossed lately as people finally meet up after a year of miserable isolation from COVID One helpful thing, at least, is our belief that Scripture completely eliminates sexual intercourse with other men — that is, anal and oral sex.
Trust me, I wish things were that simple. This makes sense to me. This belief still leaves ambiguous room with cuddling and nudity. Social norms and customs do muddy the waters. Did my adolescent lack of affectionate touch from male friends sexualize things later in life? I find this curious. The end.
However, there are a lot of grey zones with sexuality. Take me, for instance. On top of that, everyone is different. What may be no big deal with cuddling or nudity to one person may be very sexually charged for another. Enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts. Touch is a need for me, not an indulgence. I also have a genuine curiosity to explore and challenge masculinity norms, as well as the grey zones of sexual orientation.
I am certainly not doing so recklessly, as I want to do what is loving for my brothers, what is healthy for me, and what is pleasing to God. Where have you landed on issues like cuddling and nudity with other men? Have your beliefs and practices changed over time based on personal experience?
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Dang, good post. I WAS the man, now. But it wears off. Thank you Michael! Man, I would kill to have the latter experience. That sounds so wonderful. I also have had some more simple physical touch like a friend putting his head on my shoulder be the most affective opposed to big ol snuggles on the couch. Its funny that way. But yeah sadly those feelings fade after a while. I wonder how different I would be if I got this sort of thing more frequently. Unfortunately, for me…cuddling can arouse me too easily. Unfortunately, recently it has become a huge issue here… but I do have my double jab.
I find your writing very intriguing. Keep it up bro.
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Thank you very much Greg! I sometimes get arousals as well but they come and go. Just saying its not uncommon.
But its good that you at least get hugs in, gotta at least have that touch since its healthy. Cuddling for me has been life-changing. Being held in a safe situation seems to have really helped me overcome PTSD triggers and flashbacks. Nudity is no longer a terrifying experience. Touch is truly a powerful thing, and it is also mentally and emotionally healthy.
Studies show you literally need touch to keep you healthy. Thanks so much for looking back and writing this one, Eugene.
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Thank you Tom! Yeah its definitely good to go back and clarify things. Physical touch is a great thing but like all things in this world it can be spoiled by sin. the club! Yet if I could simply engage in simply hugging another man for a prolonged time, that would go a ways in filling my emotional fuel tank. I traveled to his town and met with him to spend some quality time together as he was feeling lonely and isolated.
'cuddling gives this satisfaction that nothing else sexual does.'
Very PG rated stuff up to that point. But then it got uncomfortable fast. But my sixth sense suggested to me, he wanted to have a one night stand with me at the hotel. I managed to decline his advance and drive back to my home city that day.
Physical touch and intimacy can be a wonderful thing, yet caution, certainly in this case, is warranted. Thank you Mack!
Yeah touch really is a great thing that God wants us to have, but like all things in this world it has been stained by sin. How often have I desired to express love, care, and friendship with other guys through physical touch?
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Feel loved again. And my desire is for my brother to feel loved deeply too. It would shut too many doors. For me, SSA mainly manifests as emotional unmet needs for close friendships and physical touch with other guys, preferably brothers in Christ. But I deeply desire physical touch. Sure we can survive without it.
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But this is barely talked about. But it would change my life if I could mutually embrace another guy who: A. Is open to cuddling and actually wants to cuddle. And I consider myself an alright guy.
Reasonably extraverted, but not intimidating to introverts. It rarely comes back my way though. Yes I pray about this. Nothing seems to be changing. I feel tortured at times by it all. And I know there are other guys out there just like me. I just wish we had a better way of finding one another, and that we all lived in the same town. Adam, I totally resonate with this comment and how you mentioned that Jesus has deed us for close and intimate relationships in the body of Christ. It is tough when this gets neglected.
I am finding in my church, though, that there are definitely guys who are looking more for this. If you keep your eyes open to the opportunities around you, you never know who God may place in your path. I also understand the longing to find a brother who gets you in these areas. We know, as you said, that they exist, but finding them is a whole other matter. Have you told anyone in your life about your ssa? I know you mentioned not going public, but letting someone know whom you trust may be very helpful for Naked guys cuddling. If you want to talk through this with someone, just let me know.
My desire is that no person would feel alone in this battle. Hi Adam, thanks for your heartfelt comments. I get every word that you said and everything that you expressed. I think for many years, I confused SSA as something more sexual. I have had a few sexual experiences with men and they often left me unfulfilled. I love your idea that we could all live in the same town.
I have many friends in my life, including many great guy friends. Many Godly men in my life. Someone with whom I could share a great, legitimate friendship. But also someone with whom I could be comfortable in my own skin, be comfortable hanging naked around, and be comfortable with mutual touch and cuddling. Beautifully said Adam!